I missed How I Met Your Mother because of a fire. I hope they put them out.

This is as close as I get to political satire.
You can't wear an oven mitt on your head and call yourself a fireman! I know it seems like a good idea, but these people train hard, and you can't just run in there with an oven mitt and a Supersoaker and try to play hero! I feel dizzy... Has anyone seen my car keys?